diff --git a/src/routes/nook/remote-claims.test.ts b/src/routes/nook/remote-claims.test.ts
new file mode 100644
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--- /dev/null
+++ b/src/routes/nook/remote-claims.test.ts
@@ -0,0 +1,114 @@
+/**
+ * Regression test for the removed remote / SSH claims and the removed agent
+ * count (FRE-323, FRE-359 verdict B).
+ *
+ * FRE-323 took the remote story off the site because it was unverified and
+ * demo-gated (FRE-315, FRE-320, FRE-322 §3 correction 4): the "one click
+ * installs the nook-hook" flow is app-UI-only, needs a hand-edited
+ * `~/.ssh/config` for any host not already in ssh config or on the tailnet,
+ * needs a one-time `ssh-copy-id` because the app runs ssh with
+ * `BatchMode=yes`, and has no manual fallback for minting the per-host
+ * credential. FRE-359 verdict B removed the coverage count for the same
+ * reason: the /agents table lists 13 of the registry's 18 rows.
+ *
+ * The copy was not thrown away — it is parked in
+ * `marketing/drafts/remote-ssh/` with the restore gate, and this test asserts
+ * it is still there so nobody deletes the parked story as stale. It goes back
+ * on the site only when the one-click install ships and is recorded.
+ *
+ * STATIC SOURCE AUDIT, the same pattern as `agents.test.ts` and
+ * `downloads.test.ts` (SolidJS does not render under `bun:test`).
+ *
+ * Deliberate exceptions, not audited here — both were weighed with the Chief
+ * of Staff at the go/no-go and left in place on purpose:
+ *  - `src/routes/nook/agents.tsx` Muse row: "This Mac only — remote hosts skip
+ *    it" is a limitation disclosure, not a capability claim.
+ *  - `src/components/nook/IslandExtras.tsx` "Tailscale hosts" chip: adjacent to
+ *    the removed remote story, but tailnet host lookup does exist. Raised on
+ *    FRE-323 rather than widened into this correction.
+ */
+import { describe, it, expect } from "bun:test";
+import { readFileSync } from "node:fs";
+import { join } from "node:path";
+
+const ROOT = join(import.meta.dir, "../../..");
+
+/** Shipped page and component source. Tests and drafts may quote the old copy. */
+const AUDITED = [
+  "src/routes/nook/index.tsx",
+  "src/routes/nook/agents.tsx",
+  "src/routes/nook/faq.tsx",
+  "src/components/nook/FeatureCollage.tsx",
+  "src/components/nook/FeatureBreakdowns.tsx",
+  "src/components/nook/IslandExtras.tsx"
+];
+
+/** Every sentence FRE-323 ordered off the site. */
+const BANNED_REMOTE_CLAIMS = [
+  "Agents on other machines",
+  "one click installs the nook-hook",
+  "Any SSH box",
+  "Works across every hooked agent, local or remote",
+  "Remote sessions are ordinary rows",
+  "One-click SSH setup",
+  "remote machines over SSH",
+  "this Mac or remote machines"
+];
+
+/** FRE-359 verdict B: no count, no coverage claim, in any form. */
+const BANNED_COVERAGE = [
+  "all thirteen",
+  "thirteen coding agents",
+  "13 agents",
+  "every coding agent",
+  "Supported agents"
+];
+
+/** User-facing copy only: comments are not copy and may name the old wording. */
+function copyOf(file: string): string {
+  return readFileSync(join(ROOT, file), "utf8")
+    .replace(/\/\*[\s\S]*?\*\//g, "")
+    .replace(/^\s*\/\/.*$/gm, "");
+}
+
+describe("remote claims stay off the site (FRE-323)", () => {
+  for (const file of AUDITED) {
+    it(`${file} does not restore a removed remote sentence`, () => {
+      const copy = copyOf(file);
+      for (const phrase of BANNED_REMOTE_CLAIMS) {
+        expect(copy.toLowerCase()).not.toContain(phrase.toLowerCase());
+      }
+    });
+  }
+
+  it("/agents no longer offers remote sessions", () => {
+    const copy = copyOf("src/routes/nook/agents.tsx");
+    expect(copy).not.toContain("remote sessions report into the same grid");
+    expect(copy).not.toContain("on this Mac or on remote");
+  });
+
+  it("the parked copy still exists, so restoring the story is a revert and not a rewrite", () => {
+    const parked = readFileSync(join(ROOT, "marketing/drafts/remote-ssh/copy.md"), "utf8");
+    for (const phrase of ["Agents on other machines", "Any SSH box, one click away"]) {
+      expect(parked).toContain(phrase);
+    }
+    expect(readFileSync(join(ROOT, "marketing/drafts/remote-ssh/rationale.md"), "utf8")).toContain(
+      "FRE-320"
+    );
+  });
+});
+
+describe("agent coverage count stays off the page (FRE-359 verdict B)", () => {
+  for (const file of AUDITED) {
+    it(`${file} states no coverage count`, () => {
+      const copy = copyOf(file);
+      for (const phrase of BANNED_COVERAGE) {
+        expect(copy.toLowerCase()).not.toContain(phrase.toLowerCase());
+      }
+    });
+  }
+
+  it("/agents titles the table Agent coverage", () => {
+    expect(copyOf("src/routes/nook/agents.tsx")).toContain("Agent coverage");
+  });
+});